August

Once a Child You were once a child Then twenty Then sixty Then gone And it will all be now And who will blow out The candles On your cake?

So Delicately I move your legs And your arms And your mind So delicately in unison You don't even suspect Anything's Going On

The Hierarchy At the very top Is God Who you never see But coming a close second On TV you see His and her majesties And royal highnesses And their holinesses and The very and most reverends Their worships and venerables And most honourables And even sir lords madams And ladies But seeing as God Is never on TV You don't know if he Wears a crown Or even a sheet With a hole in it

Brought me Undone The search has Brought me undone My mind is Sleeping under bridges And eating out of bins The situation's hilarious Except when Everything I gave up Suddenly seems important In the end There's no choice but to Be content With discontentment And drink wine And buy the odd Lottery ticket

Come with me Now I was buying a long sleeve shirt And I heard the voice of God "Don't worry about that shirt" Said God "Come with me now" I should have gone But came up with silly excuses As I had been looking for That style of shirt for a while And I wanted to hang around And have a cappuccino With my wife I should have gone right then Because now I'm Still waiting patiently For another chance Twenty seven years Later

The Trick I told God that If he could write down My birthday Right now without going Out of the room I would believe in him forever He scribbled the date and threw in The exact time for good measure In that instant I knew all the prophesies were true The very next day however I met a woman who said she could Do the same thing as God Almost Anyway she's going to teach me The trick

Prepare Yourself for Death Don't order sandstone For a pyramid But do in your own way Prepare yourself for death Keep on with earthly things By all means But know them as toys To fill in time If you prepare yourself well You will experience All the benefits and joys Of death While quite alive Finally though All will be vaporised In the vast supernova But if you're well prepared And flying high That won't even singe Your feathers

Out There is In Here Out there Never left in here Where all is The folds of the mind With electric sparks Is another idea floating within The source cannot Crane it's neck And turn back on itself To say "Where am I?" So what are you left with? Nothing sayable Only this

The Winter Sun Freedom is the winter sun A reminder of warmth Full of promise And hope But such a thin thread I keep thinking the winter sun Points to summer But it's really saying "I am here If I get lost in storms And can't melt the ice Freedom is still Everywhere"

Self Saucing Take nothing at all Add nothing Let it stir itself and cook For a lifetime of nows It will be delicious And disgusting Depending But the best part is It's self saucing And how it does that I have no idea

Look at me Look at me I didn't mean you to Look at each other Or even yourself Take off your blindfold Don't shield yourself From light Look at me and die For I am drop dead Gorgeous Don't bother with reflections Look directly into the source The cause Of all radiation And get burnt To a crisp

When it's Here When it comes And it's really here There's no not knowing it It's so here You can't remember even One problem that Needed fixing before There's nothing you can do Except enjoy it And if you doubt that That's another wonderful joke  You can even get a stick And try scaring it off But it won't go When it's here

Someone was Tooting At the red lights Someone was tooting It was God in his Austin Two lanes across Trying to get my attention I stared straight ahead Sensing him waving his hands As if he had something to tell me Last time we met It caused a whole lot of trouble And who needs that Suddenly the lights changed The traffic all took off And we lost each other Again

Don't Waste your Pain Don't waste your pain Especially if you have A lucky life You might try to Sit it out For better times Or think positive Or even to change things But don't waste your pain Like that Use it while you've got it When truth hurts

Lemon Sole My uncle was paying So I chose the lemon sole With salad And chips Life is a day to day thing He said Why explore it? Who wants to explore it? Some people worry But after thirty missions  I decided not to Death will come soon Probably from a heart attack Or something But there's no problem Everything is arranged Everything's in order My solicitor will open the will And everything will Be taken care of

Changing the Scenery Every time I tire of the play And go searching For truth God gets busy Changing the scenery Every day and minute that I think I'm getting closer To him He's moving the mirrors And reloading the smoke machine And tying thin wires To heavy objects Interval ends in exhaustion The bar closes And the bell rings For the next act Amazing! I'm bamboozled And enthralled What a story And all that new technology A standing ovation Is in order